Former FBI Director James Comey — the tallest man in Washington with the smallest amount of self-awareness — just got hit with his second federal indictment. A grand jury in North Carolina handed it down today, and it involves Comey posting a photograph of seashells on a beach arranged to spell out “86-47.” Prosecutors say that was a threat against President Trump.

Imagine being the former head of the FBI and getting busted for a cryptic Instagram post like a teenager who just discovered political activism. Welcome to retirement, Jim!

Now, for those of you keeping score at home — and we absolutely are — this is Comey’s *second* indictment under the current administration. The first one, filed in Virginia, got tossed because of a technicality involving the qualifications of acting U.S. Attorney Lindsey Halligan. Democrats popped champagne over that one. They called it proof that the whole thing was a “political witch hunt.”

Well, the DOJ just went back to the grand jury and got another one. Oops!

The charge reportedly involves a federal statute that prohibits depositing materials in the mail — or on social media — that contain threats to take the life of the President. Now, Comey and his army of cable news lawyers will tell you that “86-47” was just a cute little message about voting Trump out. You know, “86” as in the police code for “get rid of,” and “47” as in the 47th President. Totally innocent! Just a former intelligence chief who knows *exactly* what coded language looks like, posting coded language on a public platform.

(Comey spent his career prosecuting people for exactly this kind of thing. But rules are for the little people, right?)

Here’s what makes this so delicious. Back in March, Comey got slapped with a subpoena connected to what the DOJ is calling a “grand conspiracy” probe. We don’t know all the details yet, but the phrase “grand conspiracy” coming from federal prosecutors tends to mean someone’s circle of friends is about to get very, very small.

Remember, this is the same James Comey who stood at a podium in July 2016 and laid out a devastating case for why Hillary Clinton broke the law with her private email server — then concluded by saying no reasonable prosecutor would bring charges. He literally described a felony and then said “never mind.” The same guy who leaked classified memos to a Columbia law professor so they’d end up in the New York Times. The same guy who signed off on FISA warrants to spy on the Trump campaign using a dossier that turned out to be fan fiction funded by the Clinton campaign.

This man spent four years as the resistance’s patron saint. CNN gave him a town hall. He wrote a book called “A Higher Loyalty” — which, in retrospect, is one of the funniest titles in publishing history. Loyal to what, exactly? Certainly not the Constitution. Certainly not the truth.

And now he’s catching federal indictments like they’re frequent flyer miles.

The best part? The first indictment getting dismissed actually made the DOJ sharper. They fixed the procedural issue, went to a different jurisdiction, and came back with a clean grand jury. That’s not the behavior of prosecutors running a political vendetta. That’s the behavior of prosecutors who believe they have the goods and aren’t going to let a technicality be the end of the story.

Comey’s legal team will do what they always do — run to MSNBC, call it “unprecedented,” and claim this is the death of democracy. That talking point is getting a little stale, guys. You’ve used it for everything from Trump’s tariffs to RFK Jr. looking sideways at a vaccine vial. Maybe come up with some new material.

Meanwhile, the rest of us are going to sit back and enjoy the show. James Comey spent years positioning himself as the last honest man in Washington. He leaked, he lied, he schemed, and he preened for the cameras while doing all of it. Now the system he weaponized against a sitting president is coming for him, and he’s learning what the rest of us already knew — accountability is a lot less fun when it’s pointed in your direction.

Grab your popcorn, folks. Indictment number two is here, and something tells us this one is going to stick around a lot longer than the first.