The mainstream media has been telling us for years that the ‘Deep State’ is a nutjob conspiracy theory that only MAGA extremists believe in. The idea that the intelligence agencies are operating as an unaccountable and unelected fourth branch of government is crazy talk! Imagine our surprise last week when the New York Times came out and admitted that the Deep State is actually real. Not only that, but the Times is passionately in love with the Deep State and is thinking about having its baby.
The Times professed its love in a paywalled opinion video on its website titled “It Turns Out the ‘Deep State’ is Actually Kind of Awesome.” We’d post the video so you could see it for yourself, but again, it’s paywalled, and we’re trying to keep it family-friendly here. The Times’ lust for the Deep State is a little too steamy, and we wouldn’t want your kids to accidentally see it.
Even though the Times admits that they think the Deep State is “awesome,” they still go to the trouble of gaslighting their readers and viewers by falsely defining what the Deep State is. They ignore the fact that the intelligence agencies—the FBI, the CIA, the NSA, and some other creeps—have directly interfered in the last two presidential elections.
They ignore the fact that the Deep State fabricated the Russia hoax to help Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign or that they knowingly and falsely declared Hunter Biden’s porno and bribery schemes laptop to be Russian misinformation to help Joe Biden’s campaign. Instead, the Times wants everyone to know that the real Deep State is just the mid-level and low-level lifers who show up for work every day at obscure federal agencies that are not intelligence-related.
“When we hear ‘deep state,’ instead of recoiling, we should rally. We should think about the workers otherwise known as our public servants, the everyday superheroes who wake up ready to dedicate their careers and their lives to serving us,” gushes the Times.
Barf.
Then, they traveled to Huntsville, AL, to interview a member of what they pretend is the Deep State—the Assistant Administrator for Water at the Environmental Protection Agency. Because, as we all know, that’s who Trump is really talking about whenever he mentions the Deep State. He’s not talking about people like James Comey, John Brennan, Peter Strzok, Christopher Wray, and others who have committed black-letter treason against the American people.
Even though they can’t tell the truth about what the Deep State is, it’s nice to know where the New York Times stands. They are deeply, passionately in love with the Deep State.
Their favorite thing is to go for a long walk on the beach with the Deep State at sunset. After that, they like to enjoy a glass of wine over a candlelit dinner with the “awesome” Deep State. Then, they can settle in on the couch to watch a rerun of Jussie Smollett on Empire. Before you know it, the Deep State will have the New York Times in its arms, and they’ll be exchanging passionate tongue kisses.
And then—oh, gosh! Maybe this is just the wine talking, but…
The Times has decided that they’re finally going to let the Deep State go up their shirt. But only on top of the bra!
Yeah. It’s that creepy and weird.
The irony is that none of these dorks at the New York Times have ever read a history book. If the Deep State ever achieves its ultimate goal of becoming an all-powerful police state in America, the journalists will be the first ones loaded on the cattle car to be hustled off to the concentration camps.
“But Deep State! I love you! No! Please!”